Friday, February 27, 2009
Thursday, February 26, 2009
www.MAURICEGARLAND.com x Playboy Tre: Gain A Fan A Day
www.mauricegarland.com
Sup folks. The homie Playboy Tre is out on the road doing his thing with B.o.B. While he's out there we figured it would be a good idea to try to invite people onto the bandwagon while there is still room available. So leading up to the release of his upcoming mixtape Liquor Store Mascot, Playboy Tre is going to be hitting the streets trying to gain one new fan a day. Face to face, human contact. Yes, in this twitterfied facebooked world, such a thing still exists. Stay tuned to www.mauricegarland.com to see everything unfold.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Aggressive Listening: Public Enemy: "Black Steel In the Hour Of Chaos" x "Shut 'Em Down"
Just some more aggressive music to get you through the day. I know it helps for me. I used to listen to radio, but I don't feel like dancing or thinking about the club at the top of the morning or in the middle of the day. I swear, Atlanta's club promoters and radio program directors are working in the same building.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
ESPN=Every Suspect's Probably Negro
Brad Miller has the munchies...
I've blogged about ESPN's racial double-standards quite a few times over the years, but finally, someone has broke it down precisely. Inspired by the lack of coverage of Brad Miller's third failed drug test, SportsOnMyMind.com just did a detailed case-study of how ESPN tends to report less on white athletes who get in trouble in comparison to Black ones. Of course, its not new to most of us, but its still interesting to see it get broke down. PEEP IT HERE.
So What???
I really didn't want to say anything about this stupid ass picture the NY Post posted yesterday. I really didn't. But, it inspired me to say something nonetheless.
I urge all of you, myself included. Don't get distracted by dumb shit like this. Please. I haven't been on the internet heavy today, but I'm already hearing that the Michael Baisden's and Al Sharptons of the world are organizing protests and what not in response to this picture. Maaan, fuck this picture for real. It's bait.
We have a Black president in office now and stupid racists don't know what to do with themselves. They are slowly losing their grip of influence on the world and they are panicking. That's why we hear some more new outlandish shit from the Rush Limbaughs's of the world almost every other day. That's why we see a new story about some racist store owner, cookie maker or whoever doing some dumb shit everyday in the news. It's all bait and distraction.
This country is in a position to get out of a rut and come together and there are people that don't want that to happen. Why? It's easy to say because they are evil. But I believe its because the powers that be (Blacks and Whites) who capitalize on racism want to keep conflict going, because they get money and attention from it. The racist powers that be are running scared right now because America finally has a leader and voice of reason that isn't too too polarizing. President Obama made usually closed-minded people see past race and look at character and that hasn't happened here in a long ass time. EVERYBODY from EVERY RACE was instrumental in getting the man in office and that kind of teamwork has the people who get money and power from dividing people scared shitless.
Now, I'm all for constructive conflict, that's how lines of communication are opened which leads to great ideas and solutions being formed most times. But paying attention to every dumb ass who draws silly cartoons or spews stupidity over the airways isn't going to get the economy back in shape nor will it keep kids in schools and mothers off drugs.
I mean, ever since say, 2003-05 when social networking sites and things like youtube started getting popular we've been privy to information getting shot to us instantly. Back then, I don't recall seeing something racist every day. But ever since President Obama declared his intentions to run for President, we've been seeing new racists everyday. I'm not saying that these snakes were never there, they were simply hiding in high grass waiting to come out. But surely, I'm not the only one noticing that these racist people are getting more camera time than Paris Hilton nowadays. Really think about it, prior to the election, the only big time race-driven situations we got riled up over were Jena 6 and Sean Bell. Am I wrong? I'm open to a differing opinion.
I say all of this to say this. Don't go for the bait. Stupid shit like the above picture are made and placed strategically to distract us from other issues that we really need to be concerned about. So getting upset and protesting about shit like this is asinine to me. Look at it for what it is, stupid. Did you ever pay attention to the stupid muthafucka in school? Hell no. Paying attention to stupid people has never been cool (although reality television is doing a great job in proving that notion wrong right now).
Don't let stupid people distract us folks.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Aggressive Listening: 2Pac-"Under Pressure"/"Holler If You Hear Me"
I asked a compadre "what's rap without ego?" and they replied "Disney musicals." They were halfway right, but I think that response is more fitting when you think of rap without angst. I woke up in a certain kinda mood this morning and "Under Pressure" is the first song that popped in my head. It also got me through my workout this morning something serious. Even though its not really considered a 'Pac realease persay, that Thug Life album contained most of my favorite 'Pac songs actually.
I know alot of people say "Dear Mama" and "I Ain't Mad At Cha" and songs of the like are their favorite 'Pac joints. I'm sorry (but not really) but I liked the angry agressive 'Pac. Note, not the fueding to sell records paranoid 'Pac but the "shit I feel the same way as you right now" 'Pac. It stuff like this and "Holler If Ya Hear Me" that caught my ear most times:
But yeah, I was sharing, that's all. Peace.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Chuuuuuuch Business
Anyone that knows me [well] knows that I've had an up-and-down relationship with the church. I've been going to church since I was a child, but didn't really start paying attention or going under my own will until I well into my 20s. One of the reasons why I was always skeptical about church, or at least the one I attend is because of...you guessed it, money. Now, I've never really tripped on the pastor directly. I never felt like dude was stealing my tithe/offering money. I mean, how can someone steal what you are willingly giving to them. I try my best to be obedient in tithing/offering, but hey life happens sometimes and I'm sure most of ya'll know what I'm talking about.
But yeah, I've never had so much of a problem giving money to the church. Mainly because I've seen where at least some of the money goes. I've seen it build a school, buy buses to transport elderly people, college students and people without cars to and from church. I've seen it get cars for struggling single mothers. I've seen it get clothes/food/shelter for the homeless. Hell, it paid for my books my freshman year in college. So, I'm not really tripping off that.
The thing I trip off sometimes is how the church gets run like a business. For instance, we've all heard that saying "the churches doors are always open." Ummm, no. Not at the one I attend. Roll up there after business hours if you want to, you will be in for surprise. Really, I ain't tripping off that either, just joking and being literal...
This is the problem. Ok. Like I said, I try my best to offer/tithe on a regular basis. Sometimes I use cash, sometimes I write my credit card info on the envelope, most of the time credit card. I always found it funny (and quite diligent) that most Sundays, by the time I get home from church, the money is already deducted from my account. I'm like damn, church don't fuck around. I mean, I can go get gas, stop by Wal-Mart, hit Kroger, go to Popeye's and those monies won't be taken out until perhaps the next 1 or 2 business days. But church shawty? They gets it immediately. Can't really trip off that I guess. I giveth and they taketh away....swiftly.
Another thing that I feel funny about is how promptly the church handles money matters. For instance anyone that knows me [well] knows that I have more than a few life testimonies. I've never been one to go around talking about how hard my life has been because honestly, I know people who have been through worst. Plus, I always figured that life must not have been THAT hard, because I'm still here living and looking good doing it...;-). But sometimes a talk with a family member or close friend will happen where they might remind me of something I overcame. Which makes me realize that the average mo'fo woulda crumbled, never to be heard from again. So yeah...
I say all that to say, I've been in some dark places through my life. During these times, I called on the church. You know, I figured if the church doors weren't always going to be open, they'd at least pickup the phone. Most times, no one answered. Then the times that someone did answer, they'd pass me along to someone "better suited" to help me through that tribulation. Then there was a time when I called and the lady on the other end asked me how long and how often I went to church. I said for years and pretty frequently. Then she said some ol' bullshit talking about "well, if you've been going to church and paying attention, then you shouldn't be feeling the way you do right now."
BIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSHHHHHH!!!
Isn't that something you say to a 5th grader who just failed his math test? "If you'd been paying attention in class, you would've passed." I really wanted to understand where that lady was coming from but, damn, really? That is your answer to a obviously tortured soul on the phone with you? Now to think of it, that lady didn't even bother to pray with me or even suggest a scripture to read, man. She just told me to come back to church on Sunday. And it wasn't like this was just some woman answering the phone, I know who this woman is because she's the pastor right-hand woman. Tsk, tsk.
Then there have been times when I was interested in getting information in something the church was doing and called. I'd leave a voice message, but not get a call returned.
I say all of that to bring you to this. Like I said, sometimes I use my credit/debit card info to put money in the church. I don't have chicken scratch handwriting but sometimes if I'm in a rush to write something, it don't come out as neat as usual. On top of that, sometimes I might just miss a letter or number or something.
So, on the occasions that I've messed around and made a mistake writing my card info on the envelope, do you know that church has hit my back the very next day like "hello, Mr. Garland, we weren't able to process your information, it seems as if you made a mistake. We just wondered if you had a minute to correct it for us."
Damn, really? I can't get anyone on the phone when I'm going through some personal and spiritual battles. But you can call me right right back when somethings going on when it pertains to money? Damn, ya'll faster than Bank of America. Lord knows when I got robbed a few months ago and niggas went on a shopping spree with my bank card, the bank ain't call me and say "Hello Mr. Garland, you're spending a helluvalot of money, just wondered what's going on." That's a story for another day...
But yeah, that irks the hell out of me man. And they acted like they didn't want to get off the phone until I straightened in out. I just told them I ain't have my card in front of me and I'd just have to holler at them later. I wasn't lying. Could I have helped them, yeah. But nah, eff that man. Start returning my calls when I fucking need something.
Sometimes I feel bad that I feel this way, because I'd be lying if I said going to church hasn't helped me through life. But one thing I have learned as I got older, albeit later that some of my peers. Its the actual relationship with God that matters, not how often you go to church. That's why I started doing like Pimp C said: "I read my Bible at home, Cause I ain't payin for that nigga's Brougham." That way, I'm at peace with me and mine for the most part and don't worry about what they do.
But, am I tripping? Am I acting selfish? How do ya'll feel. What do you ya'll think of all of this?
Thursday, February 12, 2009
New Jordan Brand Commerical
Please know that the only reason I'm posting this is because Joe Johnson is in it. GO HAWKS!
Nique>Jordan
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Back Reading: The Greatest Soap Opera of All Time?
Forgive me, I'm not being lazy I'm just killing a couple birds with one stone. But, over the last month or so, I've been getting asked for links to this particular post from the former TheRezidue.com. I wrote it in March of last year and I've been told its a favorite of many. So since an unusually high number of people have asked me for a link back to this piece over the last month or so, I figured I'd repost. Enjoy.
Yesterday, I kept having old Alexander O'Neal and Cherrelle songs popping up in my head for some reason. I grew up listening to these songs on the radio and I remember seeing the videos on TV. But you know how it is when you're a kid, you know the words, you know the melody, but you don't completely grasp on to exact meaning of the songs...you feel me? You know, like how people like to play Earth, Wind & Fire's "Reasons" at their wedding...if you listen to the words, you'd know that's not the look.
Anyways, as a grown man, I'm really just now starting to understand exactly what Alexander O'Neal and Cherrelle were saying in their songs. I mean, I've known what they've been saying for some years now, but I mean, what they are saying to each other. Am I late to the game for just now discovering this? Obviously they were singing to each other on the many duets they had, but, their solo songs seemed to be a part of a long saga that Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis might have thought up.
Now before I get into this, let me start by saying that that damn Alexander O'Neal was a straight up p**** hound. This dude went hard on his songs! My brother said that from the looks he used to shoot the camera, he seemed like the kinda cat that thought like "ok now, I can sing and you can give it to me...or I can yell and I'll take it!" That said, lets start with the scenario from this "Innocent" video.
Playa ass 'Zander O'Neal walks into a diner (probably after an intense night of playing with his nose) looking like the got damn Big Bad Wolf. He spots a sweet, cute little Cherrelle and they exchange a couple looks. From the looks of it, 'Zander is the man around town as all the ladies in the diner are throwing themselves at them as if its nothing new. Cherrelle is trying to play the "innocent" role, turning down 'Zander's offerings of "alot of love." She looks like she's starting to break, but dude might have messed up saying some bold shit like "you know you could lose your innocence." When ol' girl hears that she snaps, slaps dude and runs in the bathroom to cool off. But, the Big Bad Wolf done laid his mack hand down so strong that she think she sees this nigga in the got damn mirror! That's not all, check this shit out. Dude left his car keys on the jukebox earlier so that when she walks out, she can choose or lose. She straight chose, took the keys hopped in his car, pulled up and told him to get. That's some cold game dude laid down. Peep the story for yourself below.
[Side Note: Its always a trip how back in the day the word "love" was used to substitute the more graphic terms we use when talking about sex. Oh yeah, see if you catch the "that's fragile" reference. That's some slick literary allusion right there.]
"Innocent" Alexander O'Neal f/ Cherelle
Aight, so, after they ride out, some miscommunication must have went down on the way to the crib. Evidently, Cherrelle's "innocent" girl routine turned out to be exacly what it looked like, some straight up d*** teasing. I'm not sure if they made it to the crib or not, but at some point between the diner and the house, she got on that bullshit talking about "I Didn't Mean To Turn You On." From the looks of the video, 'Zander must have gotten pissed...he went from Big Bad Wolf to straight gorilla pimp on her ass.
Cherrelle "I Didn't Mean To Turn You On"
Now, you know how niggas do when girl get on that bullshit. They do one of two things: get mad and snap or beg their ass off. Sounds like my man 'Zander O'Neal opted for the latter.
After calming down (and probably coming down from his coke high) he got emotional realized that he wasn't going to be hitting that night, and probably no time soon. So what does he do? What most niggas with blue balls would do...he hits the streets looking for the next candidate. You have to remember now, he's far from the diner where all the willing hoochies were at. So, after roaming the streets and coming up empty, he takes it to the crib where it looks like gave his mattress and pillows the business. See it for yourself in the "If You Were Here Tonight" video.
After all that dry humping, I guess 'Zander O'Neal got himself back together and decided to give it another shot. Much to his surprise, Cherrelle was entertaining his advances. Now, seeing this change in behavior, I have to assume that Cherrelle must have been playing those games because she already had a dude she was messing with, but things were going kinda sour at the time.
Cherrelle "Artificial Heart"
You know, since things in her relationship weren't exactly on the sunnyside, she probably wanted to hook up with ol' 'Zander but didn't because she wasn't all the way sure about how to do it. So looking back on the situation, she handled it like a lil' player, you just can't be having niggas from the diner all up in the house when you got a dude who just might be home or on his way there. So, after a couple conversations and rendezvous, 'Zander and Cherrelle decided get sneaky freaky on the weekends.
Alexander O'Neal & Cherrelle "Saturday Love"
[there aren't any story telling scenes in this vid, but the lyrics at the end tell the story for you: Never on Sunday, Monday's too soon...Tuesday and Wednesday JUST WON'T DO!...Thursday and Friday, we can begin...But our Saturday love, Will never eeeeeeeeend, *sugar*]
Eventually they must have got their schedules down pat to where they could see each other more than just once a week, but they still had to keep it on the low.
Alexander O'Neal & Cherrelle "Never Knew Love Like This"
[notice that they are never actually seen together in this vid until the very end. They are in different places playing phone tag and hiding their relationship from the cameras until they catch them at the end.]
Now, besides folks being all up in their business, everything seems to be going pretty good. They got a cool little understanding going on here. I mean Cherrelle was really down for this shit. Peep these vids:
"Affair" Cherrelle
[the hook says "I don't need commitment...all I need is just to be close to you"]
Hell, she even tells 'Zander that he's on his job, for real for real.
Cherrelle "Everything I Miss At Home"
Somewhere something happened though. Their little arrangement started falling apart. I think this is around the time 'Zander O'Neal started going overboard with the booger sugar, because he just started going off for no apparent reason. It didn't help that dude in the video above obviously wasn't him. That must have got him feeling all defensive and paranoid and shit.
Alexander O'Neal "Fake"
[peep how he going off about how the woman he's singing about having long hair one day and short hair the next. funny how Cherrelle went from short to long back to short in the video above]
Alexander O'Neal "Criticize"
[peep how he was sweating hard as hell singing "don't criticize my lifestyle!"]
Eventually 'Zander's outbursts became too much to deal with so Cherrelle started cheating on 'Zander and Jimmy Jam and Terri Lewis by rolling with some of Whitney Houston's producers to put out an album. The single was "Never In My Life." The song is pretty much about growing tired of a relationship that just ain't right, wanting something new. Peep it or listen.
Doesn't sound like 'Zander O'Neal was really faded though. He got back on his Big Bad Wolf and got back on the prowl. From the looks of this video, he upgraded from cheap diners to more classy establishments. Hell, at some points, he even sounded like he was telling Cherrelle "you still got the number."
Alexander O'Neal "All True Man"
Now, to the best of my knowledge and research, all of these songs are presented in chronological order. So in saying that, man, there had to be some real life shit going down between these two. You don't just make songs like these and release them in this order by mistake. Either that or them and Jimmy Jam & Terry Lewis done fugged around and crafted an epic audio soap opera that deserves some type of award.
Once again I ask, am I late in discovering this? I mean, I already know I'm crazy for putting this long ass blog together, so that's not in question. But really though...ya'll got to feel me on this one.
Yesterday, I kept having old Alexander O'Neal and Cherrelle songs popping up in my head for some reason. I grew up listening to these songs on the radio and I remember seeing the videos on TV. But you know how it is when you're a kid, you know the words, you know the melody, but you don't completely grasp on to exact meaning of the songs...you feel me? You know, like how people like to play Earth, Wind & Fire's "Reasons" at their wedding...if you listen to the words, you'd know that's not the look.
Anyways, as a grown man, I'm really just now starting to understand exactly what Alexander O'Neal and Cherrelle were saying in their songs. I mean, I've known what they've been saying for some years now, but I mean, what they are saying to each other. Am I late to the game for just now discovering this? Obviously they were singing to each other on the many duets they had, but, their solo songs seemed to be a part of a long saga that Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis might have thought up.
Now before I get into this, let me start by saying that that damn Alexander O'Neal was a straight up p**** hound. This dude went hard on his songs! My brother said that from the looks he used to shoot the camera, he seemed like the kinda cat that thought like "ok now, I can sing and you can give it to me...or I can yell and I'll take it!" That said, lets start with the scenario from this "Innocent" video.
Playa ass 'Zander O'Neal walks into a diner (probably after an intense night of playing with his nose) looking like the got damn Big Bad Wolf. He spots a sweet, cute little Cherrelle and they exchange a couple looks. From the looks of it, 'Zander is the man around town as all the ladies in the diner are throwing themselves at them as if its nothing new. Cherrelle is trying to play the "innocent" role, turning down 'Zander's offerings of "alot of love." She looks like she's starting to break, but dude might have messed up saying some bold shit like "you know you could lose your innocence." When ol' girl hears that she snaps, slaps dude and runs in the bathroom to cool off. But, the Big Bad Wolf done laid his mack hand down so strong that she think she sees this nigga in the got damn mirror! That's not all, check this shit out. Dude left his car keys on the jukebox earlier so that when she walks out, she can choose or lose. She straight chose, took the keys hopped in his car, pulled up and told him to get. That's some cold game dude laid down. Peep the story for yourself below.
[Side Note: Its always a trip how back in the day the word "love" was used to substitute the more graphic terms we use when talking about sex. Oh yeah, see if you catch the "that's fragile" reference. That's some slick literary allusion right there.]
"Innocent" Alexander O'Neal f/ Cherelle
Aight, so, after they ride out, some miscommunication must have went down on the way to the crib. Evidently, Cherrelle's "innocent" girl routine turned out to be exacly what it looked like, some straight up d*** teasing. I'm not sure if they made it to the crib or not, but at some point between the diner and the house, she got on that bullshit talking about "I Didn't Mean To Turn You On." From the looks of the video, 'Zander must have gotten pissed...he went from Big Bad Wolf to straight gorilla pimp on her ass.
Cherrelle "I Didn't Mean To Turn You On"
Now, you know how niggas do when girl get on that bullshit. They do one of two things: get mad and snap or beg their ass off. Sounds like my man 'Zander O'Neal opted for the latter.
After calming down (and probably coming down from his coke high) he got emotional realized that he wasn't going to be hitting that night, and probably no time soon. So what does he do? What most niggas with blue balls would do...he hits the streets looking for the next candidate. You have to remember now, he's far from the diner where all the willing hoochies were at. So, after roaming the streets and coming up empty, he takes it to the crib where it looks like gave his mattress and pillows the business. See it for yourself in the "If You Were Here Tonight" video.
After all that dry humping, I guess 'Zander O'Neal got himself back together and decided to give it another shot. Much to his surprise, Cherrelle was entertaining his advances. Now, seeing this change in behavior, I have to assume that Cherrelle must have been playing those games because she already had a dude she was messing with, but things were going kinda sour at the time.
Cherrelle "Artificial Heart"
You know, since things in her relationship weren't exactly on the sunnyside, she probably wanted to hook up with ol' 'Zander but didn't because she wasn't all the way sure about how to do it. So looking back on the situation, she handled it like a lil' player, you just can't be having niggas from the diner all up in the house when you got a dude who just might be home or on his way there. So, after a couple conversations and rendezvous, 'Zander and Cherrelle decided get sneaky freaky on the weekends.
Alexander O'Neal & Cherrelle "Saturday Love"
[there aren't any story telling scenes in this vid, but the lyrics at the end tell the story for you: Never on Sunday, Monday's too soon...Tuesday and Wednesday JUST WON'T DO!...Thursday and Friday, we can begin...But our Saturday love, Will never eeeeeeeeend, *sugar*]
Eventually they must have got their schedules down pat to where they could see each other more than just once a week, but they still had to keep it on the low.
Alexander O'Neal & Cherrelle "Never Knew Love Like This"
[notice that they are never actually seen together in this vid until the very end. They are in different places playing phone tag and hiding their relationship from the cameras until they catch them at the end.]
Now, besides folks being all up in their business, everything seems to be going pretty good. They got a cool little understanding going on here. I mean Cherrelle was really down for this shit. Peep these vids:
"Affair" Cherrelle
[the hook says "I don't need commitment...all I need is just to be close to you"]
Hell, she even tells 'Zander that he's on his job, for real for real.
Cherrelle "Everything I Miss At Home"
Somewhere something happened though. Their little arrangement started falling apart. I think this is around the time 'Zander O'Neal started going overboard with the booger sugar, because he just started going off for no apparent reason. It didn't help that dude in the video above obviously wasn't him. That must have got him feeling all defensive and paranoid and shit.
Alexander O'Neal "Fake"
[peep how he going off about how the woman he's singing about having long hair one day and short hair the next. funny how Cherrelle went from short to long back to short in the video above]
Alexander O'Neal "Criticize"
[peep how he was sweating hard as hell singing "don't criticize my lifestyle!"]
Eventually 'Zander's outbursts became too much to deal with so Cherrelle started cheating on 'Zander and Jimmy Jam and Terri Lewis by rolling with some of Whitney Houston's producers to put out an album. The single was "Never In My Life." The song is pretty much about growing tired of a relationship that just ain't right, wanting something new. Peep it or listen.
Doesn't sound like 'Zander O'Neal was really faded though. He got back on his Big Bad Wolf and got back on the prowl. From the looks of this video, he upgraded from cheap diners to more classy establishments. Hell, at some points, he even sounded like he was telling Cherrelle "you still got the number."
Alexander O'Neal "All True Man"
Now, to the best of my knowledge and research, all of these songs are presented in chronological order. So in saying that, man, there had to be some real life shit going down between these two. You don't just make songs like these and release them in this order by mistake. Either that or them and Jimmy Jam & Terry Lewis done fugged around and crafted an epic audio soap opera that deserves some type of award.
Once again I ask, am I late in discovering this? I mean, I already know I'm crazy for putting this long ass blog together, so that's not in question. But really though...ya'll got to feel me on this one.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Killer Mike x No ID @ Echo Studios
Killer Mike x No ID @ Echo Studios from www.mauricegarland.com on Vimeo.
Just when you thought the Killer Mike & No ID project(s) you'd been hearing about were reaching Bigfoot status, here you go. I got a chance to catch up with Mike last night to peep some of the new music from his Grind Time/Grand Hustle project and yeah, its as dope as advertised. Mike said he's looking for his Biggie moment on this album and I say he's getting there. I've heard about 5-6 roughs from the project and they're all dope. The song he was working on with No ID last night is dope, fie, hot, all of the above. But supporters of the Grind are going to have to wait a little bit longer to hear some stuff because as Mike's A&R/Manager Mr. Sills aka Bear Loc says in the video..."no leaks"..."not even for you Mr. Garland."
But yeah, I just wanted to share this video with ya'll to let you know what's been going on. Be sure to stay up with UNN as well.
Monday, February 9, 2009
www.mauricegarland.com
WWW.MAURICEGARLAND.COM
WWW.MAURICEGARLAND.COM
WWW.MAURICEGARLAND.COM
...thats where we rocking now.
All of the old TheRezidue post archives will be found over there as well. Peace.
Revenge of the Sackchasers
By now most of you have heard about both former Atlanta Falcon Jamal Anderson and former golden boy Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps going down for getting high. Both men have some sort of money meaning that they have a nice enough crib to get high in without worrying about being caught, or bothered. Why they don't keep the party at their house, I don't know, I guess getting high at home takes away from the fun.
But, I'm not even mad at the fact that these two dudes get high in their spare time, I'm moreso disappointed in how they caught. After reading on what happened with both gentlemen, I'm gonna go ahead assume that they got hated on by some Sackchasers.
What is a Sackchaser?
A Sackchaser is a person who likes to show up whenever a libation is being enjoyed and try to partake of it with out even bothering to chip in, or ask "yo, yall need anything?" Crack open some Goose, they the first one with a cup, last person with a dollar. Light up some weed, they the first person asking for a hit, last person offering to match. Line up some coke, their nose is open, but their pockets are closed. So on and so forth.
In the case of Phelps, it looks like he was making his rounds, hitting up colleges across the country to see what each "student body" had to offer and got too comfortable. He probably felt like things were kosher at the University of South Carolina and figured he could smoke a little something while down there. When he and whoever started smoking, a Sackchaser probably entered the room and wanted to get a hit. Disgusted, Phelps prolly hit him with a "hell naw, get your own" look and that's when the hating commenced. Embarrassed, the Sackchaser pulled out a camera, snapped a picture and next thing you know Phelps' lungs are known for something other than swimming underwater. Damn, you Sackchaser.
With Anderson, the scenario is even worse. Now, I'm just gonna skip over how and why in the hell this man is hanging out with 20-year old White dudes, we'll leave that for someone else to embellish on. Either way, Anderson and this white dude, for whatever reason decided to partake of some booger sugar in the men's room of a Buckhead bar. As they're sniffing some white girl off the porcalin throne, a Sackchaser hears them, knocks on the door, asking if they can get some. Appropriately, Anderson and the white dude probably instructed them to "get the fuck on." From there it seems like the Sackchaser took his bruised, sober ego and found the first security guard he could find and told them he heard some sniffing going on in the bathroom. Instead of telling the Sackchaser to stop being a snitch, the cop investigated the bathroom and boom, caught the two cokies in the act.
Now, I don't feel sorry for none of these dudes. Like I said, if you gotta get high, do that shit at the crib. Why set the stage for drama? You may mean no harm, but drugs are still illegal in the USA, so you're just gonna have to deal with it.
But, it kinda foul how both of these dudes went down at the hands of a tattle tell. Forget Stop Snitchin, Stop Telling...especially on stupid ish. I could see if you saw someone in the bathroom cocking a pistol. At that point yeah, you might want to alert authorities and promptly get the hell up out of their. But, telling on someone for getting high? C'mon man, that's just down right ghey. I don't know about ya'll, but the times I've been to parties or places where folks started pulling out coke and sniffing it, that let me know that I was in the WRONG place and got my ass up out of there. Nothing went off in my brain to make me want to call the damn cops though.
But, let this be a lesson to you smokers/sniffers/poppers/shooters or however you identify yourself. Doing drugs in public is just like when you used to go outside when you were a kid. If you come outside with food and snacks (in this case weed and blow), yo'ass better be prepared to share because people are gonna start begging. We see what happens we you act stingy.
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